There are two houses on the corner of a street closes to my house.
One is a halfway house. The police watch it damn near 24/7 and i dont believe many of them are even allowed to leave.
the other is a big brick house, with ivy growing up the walls; the green arms reaching and grasping to anything to keep it crawling higher.
outside one of these houses, the residents sit on the porch, some talking to themselves, some smoking their independently rolled cigarettes.
across the road in front of the brick house, an older man in his fifties stands outside with a cowboy hat on, holding a boombox from the 1990s, the early 1990s. Sometimes he carries a bible. sometimes he stands with his hands folded.
it occured to me the other day as i passed Cowboy on the way to work, "what if this man is God?" a lone ranger on the corner, watching over people as they pass. i wonder 'should i capitalize the H in him? should i stop and ask him questions?' Should i ask him if i am leading my life correctly? am i pleasing Him? This man could very well just be crazy.
but what if?
What if at the end of it all He asks me "i was there. You passed me many times a week. and you NEVER stopped to say hi."
Then i wonder...
what if he is the convict sitting on the porch of the house across the street?
What if i stopped in front of the stop sign 20 feet from the hous eevery day, and locked my doors...only to lock my doors from him?
what if i kept looking forwarded and avoided him.
what if i have been doing it all wrong because i am a judgemental fool?
the what ifs will drive you crazy.
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